A Bullet Always Tells the Truth(Kaz)

[Legion]

I'll Paint it on the Walls

Patrick had no goddamned clue why he was here. In all rights it was a bad decision for him to come here, a very bad one. Especially in his state of mind. He didn't believe in shit at the moment. There was no reason to draw breath other then the fact that it was an involuntary action. There was no good reason for him to come to a place that held such pain for him on a good thing, let alone now. After everything that happened. After everything he had done. During everything that was going on. Then again, he wasn't exactly in the best frame of mind either. Everything that had gone on, it was finally catching up with him. He couldn't have predicted the outcome, because well honestly, he hadn't expected to still be standing. Even if he had pulled it off after telling X to go fuck himself, well Patrick figured he had been a dead man. He had even smoked his last before going in.

But here he was, once again because his frame of mind was shit. In a place he generally avoided like the plague, but well the rapidly draining bottle of whiskey in his hand was helping that. No, he wasn't drunk, but he was well on his way to working towards it.

Patrick stood, looking down at that spot with a sense of loss in his green eyes, no longer choosing to wear the blue contacts. No, he stood, barely, before the spot that held so much emotion looking his former self. Well, much like his former self, he was missing the bandanna and the long hair, but he had let his hair return to its natural red. Patrick stood there, entranced by the red spot. He was wearing a bullet riddled trench coat, tactical pants, combat boots and underneath a kevlar vest a tanktop. There wasn't an article of clothing that wasn't black. The only thing that was off about this trip from ones in the past was that his kevlar vest, while busted with numerous rounds, wasn't the one he usually wore here. There was no hole in the chest, rather this one had a hole on both sides of the stomach and lower back. Hell there was even a hole that corresponded with the trench coat and tank top.

Patrick sighed, taking another drink of whiskey before the bottle slipped from his fingers. Not out of drunkenness, but simply out of apathy. A pained look crossed the irishman's face as he looked up on the space from the mostly leveled dock, looking out to sea. Another sigh and a kick came, forcing the bottle into the ocean as Patrick looked down at the blood stain in front of him, reminding him of his failure.

The red headed specter appeared next to him asking, "What are you doing here Patrick?"

"And ye said it'd be a good idea," Patrick said in his irish accent, not answering her question.

"You shouldn't be here."

"Nothing's changed. If anything, things are worse. My reason for existence has never been clearer. I kill to live, nothing more. I was a fool to think that anything could change."

"You don't see the full picture."

"How long do ye intend to keep feeding me that line?" Patrick asked, bitterness and anger in his voice, "I'm fucking sick of the bullshit."

She disappeared as Patrick stared ahead, looking at the nothingness of the ocean, feeling nothing but loss. His task was done. He had gotten vengeance, and yet he was still here. Meaningless existence, perpetuated. Patrick gave a forced chuckle. That was real punishment. Continuing on in nothingness, again. Patrick closed his eyes, falling to his knees.

A moment passed before his right hand went to a holster while his left hand found a clip. Slowly drawing the pistol he had used to kill so many Patrick shoved the clip in. Pulling back the action Patrick heard and felt a round being chambered. Eyes opening, nothing but loss in them as his hand slowly pressed the gun to his head.

"I'm sorry, I pretended ye didn't exist Kazumi," Patrick said eyes staring forward, "I know it's meaningless now. But. Patrick O'Connor. If ye can hear me where ever ye are my name's Patrick O'Connor."

Patrick closed his eyes, giving a swift inhale before pulling the trigger.

CLICK...

[Kazumi O'Connor]

She wasn't sure what she was doing here. Really, she had no clue. It was just one of those days, where she found herself putting one foot in front of the other and not paying attention to where they carried her. Dressed in a pair of faded denim jeans, with holes worn into the knees and flaring around her rather beaten up sneakers, along with a white t-shirt, though it was hidden beneath the jacket she currently wore.

Long dark locks spilled forth over her chest, out from under the hood that was currently pulled up concealing her features from view. It was dark, the only reason that she bothered to venture out of the house at all. She found it harder and harder to sleep at night, and so, with the cover of darkness to keep her calm and to keep the anxiety at bay, she was able to move about the city more freely and explore.

Sure, she had been living in the city for awhile now, but this was a different area, one that she didn't know. For her, it was pretty much like having moved to a new town entirely, and so, with nothing better to do in order to pass away the sleepless hours, she walked. Her hands stuffed into her pockets as she slowly made her way toward the dock. She didn't want to say that it felt like there was some invisible hand guiding her, telling her to go there, but in a way there was.

Even with her desire to explore and learn of her surroundings, she had no legitimate reason for being in such a place. If anything, she should probably want nothing more than to stay away from such a place as this, given the fact that there were things about it that reminded her, if only a little, of that place she had been locked in. That....place...where she had been broken and had lost a part of herself she was not sure she would ever be able to find again.

Her head down, eyes trained upon her feet as she moved, she paid little attention to the things going on around her, and it is quite possible that had she not heard her name a short distance away, she would have walked by the entire scene without noticing any of it. But, that was not the case. No, because she did hear her name and the sound of it brought her to a stop, dead in her tracks. She recognized the voice, even if her eyes did not recognize the figure she turned to see........At first.

Yet, that voice she knew, accent and all. Enough so that instead of becoming gripped with fear and panic that she had been discovered by Earth and the other Dragons, she was frozen with a sense of uncertainty and confusion. Uncertain on what to say or do, confusion over why he would be speaking her name when his back was to her and there was no way he could have seen her approaching or known it was her.

She had not seen him since that day in the hotel when she had picked him up off the street to help him when she had felt that he needed her help. She had not told him she was alive, and though she assumed everyone knew at this point, she was certain, by the way he spoke to her, that he believed her to still be dead.

Then....she saw the gun, and there was a quick hitch in her breath as she instinctively moved to take a step forward before hearing the click. A little panicked sound escaping her her before she would quickly speak up. "Daniel...I..I mean Patrick....Please...." What was she going to say? She had heard him. Heard him say his name, tell her his name...finally...But he was clearly broken, hurt....destroyed and he clearly thought she was dead.....She also knew that he saw and heard things that were not there....What could she do really other than tell him to please wait..."Patrick...please....i...its me..." She slowly edged herself forward and around to the side of where he was, her hands moving to push the hood back from her face to show that it was indeed her.

[Legion]

CLICK

Patrick paused for a moment, opening his eyes in angered confusion. That was not what was supposed to happen, at all. Quickly Patrick would lower the gun, all but ignoring the girl next to him as he pulled the slide back, ejecting the round. Catching it with his right hand he looked at the 45 round, a look of disgust crossing his face. There was a dimple on the primer, bad. The primer had failed to go off, failed to ignite the powder in the shell firing the round. Patrick eyed the round as he continued to keep his grip on the still very live pistol, finger now removed from the trigger. His eyes now glanced at the girl to his left.

It was her. Kazumi Badoer. Just another body among the many. Just another ghost coming to haunt him. To prod him to some unforeseeable end, making the rat race seem worth running. The truth was though, there was no worth. There was no end to the race. There was only to keep running and falling into pitfalls. But this? Kazumi? That was new. She even had the scar along her neck to boot, but then again, that seemed par for the course. Everyone else had theirs, well save for Zea, occasionally.

"What is this?" Patrick asked, half to her, half rhetorically, "Some sick joke?"

"I kill and uncountable number of people with this gun, never having a misfire, until now?" Patrick said with some bitterness in his voice, "There's no one more deserving."

There was a long pause. The cruelty of this was nearing the edge of imagination. Then again, Patrick mused, it seemed on par with the course of events. He walked away from Earth's lair, only to wind up being tracked down by X, put into a "corporate" hospital and nursed back to health. Instead of finding himself staring down the barrel of a gun, or behind bars, he found himself being told he was a significant investment. That he had merely carried out the will of the higher ups. It was all one bad conspiracy. Patrick found himself being told that his debt of service was no longer done. This time making his jobs lethal in nature, forcing him to dodge the ever present eye of the New York underground.

That had been bad enough, but now this? Fate really was a bitch.

"This isn't how it's supposed to work. I got yer vengeance already," Patrick said quietly, his eyes looking back to that blood stain in front of him, "I don't understand why ye have to haunt me now, after the fact..."

[Kazumi O'Connor]

She didn't move at first, only gave a soft whimper as his words began to flow into the air. What was she supposed to say? She knew that he say the ghosts of those from his past that had died, she knew they haunted him. She knew about the girl he saw, the one he had loved and had lost, so for her, it was not hard to believe that he thought her too an illusion.

But she wasn't, and still she didn't know how to make him see that. Moving forward as he finished speaking, she dropped down to her knees in front of him, a small, trembling hand coming forth as she shook her head, tears in those bright blue eyes as the color slowly began to shift toward that amethyst color they so often held when her heart became consumed with emotion. "No...No its me...I am not dead Patrick...I ...I know its hard to believe, but I am real...I swear..."

That hand brushing against his cheek, tears slowly spilling forth and rolling down her cheeks as she captured her lower lip between her teeth. She should have sought him out sooner, she should have found him and let him know that she was alive....But she had thought....Well she had thought that perhaps, he would look at her with some kind of disgust, if he knew....If he knew the things that had happened, if he knew the things that Earth had done to her.

Already, before any of that, he had turned his back on her, he had pushed her away....She could only assume that if he found out about all those things, found out how ruined and defiled she was....How dirty...That he would only push her away that much harder, and honestly, she had not been sure at the time that she could handle such. Not again.....Not when she had cared so much about him despite everything.

"Please....just look at me...I know, I know you that you see the others, I know they are not real....But I am...I should have found you sooner, I should have said something....But I was scared..." She choked back a soft little sob, her thumb brushing along his cheek as she tried her best to remain composed. Never had she thought that he would be this way, would have reached this kind of low, because of her. Oh, she was sure there were other things to contribute, but after the way he had turned her away.....repeatedly.....she would have expected her death not to have meant much to him, especially when he saw it so very often.

"What are you two kids doing!?" An old man walking past, likely some make shift watchman for the place, stopping at the end of the dock as he noticed the two...A speculative glance given before he would move to take a step closer....."Nothing Sir....W..We were just talking. We will be leaving in a minute..." Calling out to him to try and get him to leave, watching as he shot them a rather suspicious glare before turning to make his way onward.

Quickly she turned back to Dan.....Patrick, her hand never having left his cheek, unless of course he removed it...Tears continuing to flow.

[Legion]

"What?" Patrick asked blankly as he looked her in those amethyst eyes. The tone in his voice holding suspicion, and disbelief. No, Kazumi was dead. He had seen it with his own eyes. He saw that sword slash across her throat and blood pooling out. She was dead. But why was she trying to convince him that she was still alive? That was something that none of the others had tried to do. This was a new low. Had he not suffered enough? Been tortured day in and day out, but that did not satisfy the ghost's blood lust? Patrick sighed though, he deserved every bit of it.

Then again she was crying, what was that all about? She wasn't a snake, at least Patrick hadn't seen any of that in his brief time knowing her. Usually what he saw of his ghosts was reflective of what they were in life. So Patrick highly doubted that she was just trying to fuck with him. At the same time though, crying for him? That seemed out of place to. Never was there any pity, at least that's what he could remember. Any sadness was never for his sake. This was new, although Patrick remember Mrs Badoer telling him that Kazumi was different. Could that be at play in her ghost now?

Then she went to trying to convince him that she was real again, at the behest of the others. That was definitely different. None of the others every tried to say that the others weren't real. All this was serving to do was thoroughly confuse Patrick. His hand came up to touch hers, the one on his face. He knew that her touch and his touch meant nothing. He was allowed physical contact with ghosts at other points, all the same, there was some comfort in that. Perhaps he should just give into his insanity. Just believe she was still alive. Was that what was supposed to happen here?

Then there was the man yelling at them, the two of them. Patrick glanced back even more confused. He hadn't killed that man, nor had he seen him die. As Kazumi answered he realized he had never seen the man before. Patrick's eyes returned to hers, confused. What exactly was this? The man seemed real, but then why did he address two people? And why did he respond to his ghost?

"I...I don't understand..."

[Kazumi O'Connor]

She turned back to him as he spoke, feeling his hand as it brushed against her own, those tears still falling slowly down her cheeks as she leaned in just a bit more. "I..I don't know...I wish I could tell you....I just know that I was dead, and then I woke up...Earth..he did something to bring me back...."

She choked on the words, feeling them leave a bitter taste in her mouth as the memories of why she had been brought back surfaced into her mind. She looked away, just slightly, shame crossing her gaze at the mere thought of everything that had occurred while she had been locked away. Though she quickly tried to regain herself, turning once more to look at him and a small whimper escaping her throat. "Please...you have to believe me...I am real....I swear..."

She hesitated for a moment before she leaned in and ever so slightly brushed her lips against his own. Nothing overly passionate or anything of the sort...just a soft, gentle reminder of who she was....the feeling produced in that, hopefully something that could not be mimicked by some ghost or whatever else you wished to call them.

Slowly she pulled back, those eyes once again meeting his own as she tried to force a small, somewhat nervous smile onto her lips. Reassuring, the best she could, that she was indeed here and that she was indeed real.

Slowly, her hand would move to pull away from his face. Not sure that it was helping anything and not wanting to make the situation worse than it already clearly was. Her head lowering, she sniffled softly, not sure what else she could do or say to make him understand or believe. Hell, if she had not lived it she was sure she wouldn't be able to believe....."Please believe me...." One last ditch, desperate plea for him to believe her....the only thing left she could think to say and the words coming forth in a soft little whisper just under her breath. Both hands now resting in her lap, fingers twisting and fidgeting together in a degree of nervousness that was all too common to her these days.

[Legion]

She forced out her brief explanation. She mentioned Earth, which elicited no response from Patrick, at least not one that someone would have come to expect from him. No, Patrick couldn't really be angry at Earth anymore. That wasn't some lofty ideal though, some justification of the faux Earth's actions. Patrick couldn't bring himself to hate the man anymore because the man had paid in full for his crimes. Don't get him wrong, Patrick would hate the man's actions and the effects of those actions until the day he died, he just couldn't hate something that didn't actually exist anymore.

"I'm sorry," Patrick said without thinking, when he saw that look of shame cross her face. No, it wasn't an idle set of words. Patrick meant every word, that much was clear in his voice. He just hadn't thought of the ramifications of what she had told him. He would have imagined that it would have been pretty horrible. If she were alive then what he'd have done in those three months must have been absolutely brutal. Especially to get a look of shame from her. Patrick had to wonder exactly what it was he had done. He wanted to guess, an idea forming in his head but sense told him to keep silent.

A moment passed before he went back to wondering the validity of her claims. It seemed like too much, too complicated to simply be a made up fiction. There seemed to be many signs pointing to the fact that she was alive and real in the flesh. Too many signs to show that this was not just some faked fiction. But once again, she had died. How did one come back from that? How did you bring someone back from that?

Swearing she was real again she moved in brushing her lips against his. The feeling soft, comforting, warm and nostalgic. Surprising, even for a ghost this would be odd, weird one might even say. The feelings it created in Patrick were indescribable. It felt good, but also uncertain. Patrick wanted to believe that she was alive. He wanted to, really. But he was uncertain of what that meant. Was he slipping further into insanity? Was this really happening? Acceptance seemed like jumping off the slippery slope because people couldn't come back from the dead. But at the same time, the evidence.

She pulled back, giving him a reassuring smile, that seemed like she wasn't entirely assured as she meant to inspire in him. Her hand dropped from her face and along with her gaze, pleading with him one last time to believe her.

There was a long pause. Patrick didn't know. There was a sense of existential distress going on. If he believed her, what did that mean for life as he knew it? There seemed to be a question even deeper then was she alive or not that seemed at play here, and Patrick couldn't put his finger on what that was. Maybe he really was crazy. The evidence seemed to suggest that that was the case, along with her being alive, the two not seeming mutually exclusive.

Patrick pocketed the bullet in his left hand before slowly raising his hand to her chin, lifting her head so that his gaze met hers.

"I believe ye," Patrick answered her plea, uncertain of what that meant, but nonetheless deciding this was the path he was going to take...

[Kazumi O'Connor]

She wasn't sure what to say. The apology, it was honest and true but in her mind, she knew that he had nothing to be sorry for. She had heard people say they were sorry, when they found out what had happened to her, but none of it really mattered in the end. She had still lived through that hell and she was still here, and none of them, including him had anything to be sorry for. It wasn't something anyone could have stopped, and though she wished time and time again that somebody would have saved her, she knew that they had all thought she was dead....So, why would they have tried?

Continuing to fidget her fingers within her lap, she refused to raise her gaze toward his once more. She wasn't sure she could to be quite honest. He was not somebody that she could convince as easily as she had her brother or Issac....A stab of pain at the thought of the other boy, though she quickly pushed it away. Her mind becoming distracted by the feel of Patrick's hand as it came beneath her chin, forcing her head up so that her eyes could again meet his own.

When he spoke, she felt her breath once more hitch within her throat, tears flooding her eyes as a weak, yet happy smile curled upon her lips. Without thinking, she would shoot forward, her arms wrapping about his waist as her small body curled up just enough that she could press her head against his chest, just below his chin. In her mind, she knew that he had wanted distance from her in the past, and she honestly could not blame him for wanting such now....but just for a moment, she wanted to feel closeness to him. There had been a few people that she genuinely cared about before all that mess had taken place, and despite everything that had happened between them, he had been one of them. "Thank you..." It was all she could think to say. To thank him for believing her. To thank him for being here, now....For telling her his name, even though he had not meant it directly at the time or at least, not expected her to actually hear him.

Long dark locks fell across her face, concealing her from view as she held tightly to him and tried to ward off the trembling that always seemed to come in moments such as this. It had gotten better, if only just....since she had been set free, but it was there none the less. A soft, choked little sob given before she would turn her head just enough to bury her face into his chest.

When she had come back, she had thought that those she cared about would be there, would not leave her or abandon her...that she wouldn't end up alone, again.....But Zeke was gone...Issac was gone....and in the end, Kazumi had ended up alone....She was almost terrified that now that he knew she was alive, Patrick would be gone to...would disappear from her life just like everyone else....so for now, she held on because she wasn't sure how long she would have to do so before it was all taken away from her again.

[Legion]

He admitted that he believed her. While he was still uncertain of what that meant for his sanity, he was glad. It didn't matter at this point. It seemed like he had something believe in. Something more then an all consuming goal that would inevitably claim his life. He didn't know what tomorrow would bring, but for the first time in a long time he was hopeful. It was small, tiny even, but it was something, regardless of what the outcome here was.

She rushed in for the hug, which, ultimately surprised him. All the same though, it was as comforting to him as it was to her. Though the surprise of it almost knocked him over. As she hugged him, he lifted his free left hand. He felt her head just bellow his chin, holding his hand out he looked down at her, still having difficulty believing it was really her. Giving a little sigh he put his hand on her head. Believable or not, he was glad she was back. He didn't pretend to know what had happened to her, but that was what his apology really had been. He was sorry that she had to go through it, because he had been through something akin to that. Patrick knew just how life altering that could be, and he was only held for a month, not god knows how long.

"I'm sorry ye had to go through all that," Patrick said quietly, "But ye don't have to worry about Earth anymore, he won't hurt ye again."

He didn't really explain, but that seemed irrelevant. He just wanted to comfort her. They seemed like choice words given the circumstances. He gave a slight smile as he held her, reaching back with his right hand, pushing back the coat and holstering the gun he had in his hand. It didn't look like he'd be needed that anymore. At least not for tonight...

[Kazumi O'Connor]

She felt his hand come to rest upon the back of her head, a little sigh escaping her as she closed her eyes. It felt good, and for what time it would last, she would be thankful of it. Though when he spoke, his words would cause her body to tense up rather tightly, the trembling in her muscles growing more intense as she seemed to try and hide herself against him.

She understood the words, and yet she could not help but fear the mention of that name. It was terrifying, because of how many memories it brought back. Some were more clear than others, while some remained hidden in a fog. Hidden behind things that she did not yet want to accept, or so she supposed.

Still, there was something, some nagging sense in the back of her mind that said something was off. Something about what he said, what he meant, was.......wrong. But she couldn't quite place it. Yet she did not question it, she simply pushed it aside. "I don't want to go back there..." She had a hard time wrapping her mind around the possibility that it was not going to happen. That Earth was gone. Just as he had a hard time wrapping his mind around the fact that she was alive.

Some things just didn't seem possible. Still, she wanted to believe him and for now, she would. But that did not mean she would question how, or why such a thing was possible. Sure, there was a part of her that wanted to know, but for now, more important matters weighed on her mind than that.

Slowly, she would pull back, those amethyst eyes looking up into his, red tinging her gaze from the tears she had cried and tears streaking down her cheeks. "I am so sorry that I didn't tell you sooner...." Her tone weak and breaking slightly as she tried to get the words out, one hand raising upward again, fingers softly tracing along his cheek despite the fact that they continued to tremble lightly. "I...I ju...just thought that you...." She cut herself short, not really wanting to say the words but unable to help thinking them. That he would not have cared? Or perhaps that he would not have believed? She wasn't sure....whatever it was, it had caused her to be afraid....Now though...well now she regretted it. Still, she would just shake her head, showing that her words were of no real importance and quickly moving to rest her head against him once more. The tears finally slowing enough tat she could at least breath somewhat normally, though she was hesitant to pull away just yet...sure that he would push her from him once he was ready.

[Legion]

Patrick felt her trembling increase at the mention of the name Earth. He frowned, at the thought that she was so fearful of the man that the name would get such a reaction. There was a part of him that thought whatever it was that he had done to her, had to be somewhat imaginable, even to him. And for that, he felt bad bringing it up. The only real comfort he could give her was simply to be there for her. At this point explaining that he killed the man seemed ill advised and unwarranted. Yeah, the best thing was to simply just be there for her, and let her know that it was over.

"I know, and ye don't have to," Patrick said calmly, reassuringly. These things would take time, he figured. Healing would be a long process, lifelong even. Patrick wasn't sure if it would ever be completely healed but it was a process. This time he'd be here for her. This time he wouldn't run or push her away. Life was too short. A lesson he should have already known, that you had to make the best of the time you had, especially in this city, because everything could be torn apart in a New York minute.

She pulled back to speak, her fingers tracing his cheek. The touch was pleasant, but it was just a nervous habit to get away from the fact that she was struggling to get words out. When she did Patrick wasn't mad or in the slightest bit upset. She didn't finish the sentence but she didn't have to. Patrick knew what she meant. He simply smiled at her acceptance in his eyes. As her head buried it's way back into his chest Patrick's hand returned to her head, while the other arm wrapped around her back, "Ye don't have to be sorry. I gave ye no reason to believe that I would have cared."

That and well, he'd been MIA for the better part of a few months, and well she had no real way to contact him. That didn't seem like it needed to be said though...

[Kazumi O'Connor]

It was odd really, that he didn't push her away. She kept waiting for it, but instead she felt his hands shift to once more hold her against him. It felt good, comforting almost, and she couldn't help but ever so slightly nuzzle into him, lifting her head just enough that her nose was able to gently brush against the side of his neck. "Everything....everything has changed so much....F..First me, then...m..my life....now schools...." She let out a soft sigh. She tried to speak more normally, but the nervousness she seemed to always feel had created a bit of a stammering problem for her. Though sometimes she did okay....but usually, if she got the slightest bit worked up, words became harder and harder for her to find.

"When...I..I woke up on that street....I thought that I was finally free....But, no matter what, its like I am always still there....in that room..." She had finally managed to cease her crying, though her tone was still shakey at best and she was still speaking just above what could be considered a whisper.

Once more she allowed her eyes to fall closed, simply savoring the closeness, for what it was worth, knowing all too well how easily it could be taken away from her. "I am ...s..so alone here...My brothers are gone.....Issac is gone.....everyone is just...gone and I...I just..." She cut herself off once more, realizing that she was rattling on about things that made no difference, at least not now, at least not in this moment. It was just that she spent so much time staying silent, staying to herself, that to have somebody she knew, somebody she had allowed herself to feel close to, even with his constant efforts to push her away......well it felt good and it felt like for once, in a very long while, she was able to actually just....open up and be herself. Or well....the girl that was left after everything that had happened.

"I am sorry...I just...just..." She paused, not sure how to go about saying this. If anyone would understand what was happening in her mind she was sure it was him, but then, she couldn't be entirely sure. "He made the voice in my head go away....Phee...h...he made her stop talking, and now...." And now, she was more alone than she had ever been in her entire life. She just hoped that he would understand that and not judge her for her pathetic rambling.

[Legion]

As she nuzzled into him Patrick held her, and simply listened. It was really all he could do. Change was an inevitability of life, though most people didn't seem to realize that, taking periods of time for granted. While simple concepts and facts of life remained the same, the situations in which they applied were constantly shifting, people being forced to adapt and play catch up to meet them. It was people's refusal to see this that was a constant cry for stability, but denial never seemed to be a sufficient answer. Patrick wasn't any different, he too wished for some form of stability, but he had come to terms with the fact that he was likely never able to get that. That didn't make his desire for such a stability any less potent though.

"Almost like a piece of ye died there?" Patrick asked to her reference to the room. It was simple curiosity, though it stemmed from an attempt to provide familiarity. Because the truth was, regardless of whether he was physically on the dock or not, he always felt like he was really here, in memory if nothing more. The irishman was firmly convinced that Patrick O'Connor had died on this dock those years ago, however contradictory that might be, and the answer was very. At a very least a piece of him was blown to hell here.

He empathized with her feelings of being alone. Truth was, he had been alone for a long time, at many points throughout his life. Patrick didn't know the specifics for each person that was gone, and that made him slightly curious but he said nothing. Words and questions here were most likely far from helpful. What would be more helpful was simply to be here, just to show that she wasn't alone, not anymore, not now. Sadly as much as Patrick would have liked to he could make no promises. He had no idea what tomorrow held. Where he would be called of to go, what he would be asked to do, or even if he'd come back. Right now life seemed so brief. He had no future. That belonged firmly to X. Right now he lived only for today, but that had been his way for years at this point.

She apologized for rambling and to that Patrick simply replied with a quiet, "It's okay."

Patrick didn't mind, in fact it was probably for the best that she was talking it out. It showed the starting signs of dealing with it. That and Patrick wanted to let her know that it was going to be okay. He wouldn't give a timeline, because, well, that sad truth was that he couldn't. He simply listened as she explained about how earth made her little friend disappear.

He didn't know what to feel about that. A part of him wanted to be glad for her, another part felt bad that something so integral to her personality, her way of life had been torn from her. Patrick wasn't sure he completely understood but he had an idea.

"Almost two years ago," He said quietly, "An enemy found out who I was. She cornered me, captured me. Torture and shit. But that was whatever, I could deal with the beatings. What she did that really got me was she drugged me. I don't quite remember what that was, datura, it think that's what it was called. It made me hallucinate, see people that weren't there. People that died. At first I hated it. They constantly served as a reminder of my failures and losses. The things they'd say to me were pretty vitriolic, though I can't deny their truth, even now. I thought it would get better when I got away. That it would stop when I stopped getting drugged. It didn't. They may have stopped being so vitriolic but I still saw them. I use to wish they'd go away, for years. I guess I still do wish they'd stop, but now? There's a part of me that doesn't want them to go. I dunno, it doesn't make sense but I feel like it's a part of me. I can't imagine what it'd be like without them"

Patrick didn't know if that was somewhat similar to what she was feeling, or if it even helped but he felt like it needed to be said. To get some sort of connection out there. He didn't know though...

[Kazumi O'Connor]

She listened intently to what he had to say, a little sigh passing her lips as she remained there against him, nodding slightly. She understood what he meant, because up until she had been captured, there had been a part of her that wanted so badly for Phee to go away. She wanted to be normal, she wanted to be like all the other girls that she saw from day to day. "I used to wish she would go away, that I could just be normal, be like everyone else. I thought....I thought that..i...if I was, then people wouldn't treat me the way th..that they did." She struggled to speak without stammering, though it was harder than she could have imagined.

"But...w..when I was in that room...and h..he was ra..raping me...I begged for her to come back....to help me...to not leave me alone with him..But she was gone..Now, th...there is nothing but silence. I thought when the drugs wore off...t..that maybe she would come back....but instead...there...are just these blackouts..." She lowered her head a bit, a soft whimper lodged in her throat as she offered another weak little nuzzle against him. She understood too well that he knew, somewhat, what she was speaking of. If anyone besides her brothers could come close to understanding, it was him.

But it was still hard to talk about, still something she was scared she would be looked at like a freak for....but of everything she said....admittance of what Earth had done to her was what had her trying to pull away in shame and embarrassment....Her head lowered now, thinking back to that and about how dirty and ruined it made her feel. Again she felt her stomach turn, a little sound of discomfort given as she wrapped her arms about her midsection and once more began to tremble rather heavily. "Th..The thin...things he did...." She couldn't really keep talking....the words so bitter as they rolled off her tongue. The images flashing through her mind like the ones that he had forced her to watch for hours on end, day after day.....

[Legion]

As she spoke about her desire to be normal Patrick nodded, not that she could see him but still. Patrick didn't quite understand what that was like but he figured he had some pretty relate-able experiences. Any time he had been the outcast he had pretty much done so by choice, so he hadn't felt any shame in being, despised and hated. It had just gone with the territory. His ghosts were constantly with him, feeling them as much a part of him as she did with Phee. Patrick could come close to understanding, even if he had never experienced it in the way she had.

When she spoke of being raped Patrick gave a soft pained exhale of air. Rape was always something he had found particularly disgusting, even without morality. He was troubled that she had had to experience that. Though in his mannerisms there was still no anger towards the dead man, simply sadness that she had to go through that, alone no less. The man's actions would always be hated by Patrick but there was nothing he could do to change that. He wouldn't hate the man anymore though, his task in that was completed. All he could offer now was security and his words, "I'm so sorry ye had to go through that alone."

But blackouts though? That was interesting. Patrick had difficulty understanding how faux earth could make Phee disappear. That seemed incredibly difficult and well, a tad to altruistic. The black outs though, Patrick had already formulated his theory. He had known enough people who "blacked out" to make his line of thinking drift this way. But it was nothing more then a theory at this point, unless further evidence was presented, "Blackouts?"

But the desire to confirm the theory died when she pulled away. holding her midsection in shame. She trembled heavily making it clear to Patrick what she was feeling and thinking about. As much as Patrick wanted to reach out and hold her that would not be the right response. It seemed like a violation of personal space, as if his touch would be somewhat of an intrusion seen or related to faux Earth's. That would be counter productive.

She tried to force out words and she failed causing Patrick to frown further saying quietly, "I want to help but all I can offer is my presence now, and maybe the comfort in knowing that he can't ever do that again."

He avoided saying the words directly but he figured his words heavily implied it. Patrick couldn't undo what was done to her, but he could assure her that the man was gone forever, unable to hurt her anymore then he already had. He didn't know why he refused to say it directly but he did. If she asked he would answer but until then he would say nothing further on the subject...