Lots and Lots of Space (open)

[The Fearless Sausage Cook]

Frank sat in the park on this brisk fall day. It was the park that was near his parent's and Emma's House. Frank sighed thoughts swirling around in his head. Thoughts concerning Emma, his daughter and not his sister. The enormity of that weighing on him and all of his actions at presence. A stronger sense of responsibility coming over him.

Though he hadn't really seen Emma since they had both learned that he was her father. The revelation was something that came just as much of a surprise to him as it did to her. But it didn't change the love he had for her. He was perfectly willing to be her father. He'd take her in as a daughter if that was what she wanted. In fact he wanted that. Especially now as his own parents were getting this crazy notion into their head that Emma needed surgery. One that could possibly give her her hearing back, but also one that could possibly damage her brain. The surgery was something that she had expressed fear about and that was in addition to not wanting to have the surgery. In fact, at this point that was why he hadn't pressed her any further. He wanted to give her time and space to come to terms with what she had learned about him. He didn't want to force her into anything like his parents were trying to force her into this surgery.

Frank honestly wanted to talk about this with Emma but at the same time he knew things would be better if she came to him. He couldn't just show up and start acting like her father and expect her to act like his daughter. They were, or had been brother and sister, the dynamic so completely different it was astounding to Frank standing where he did now. Besides they had been apart for eleven years, even as brother and sister. To just up and act like that, would be wrong to him on a level he couldn't even describe. To force that upon her would make him just as bad as his parents, no worse, and that was something that he couldn't do. Frank needed to do what was best for her and for now, that was giving her her space and although he was worried about his parents, he knew that they couldn't make her have the surgery without his consent, something he wasn't going to give.

So with all those thoughts Frank sighed, sitting on the park bench. The park that Frank knew that Emma frequented. He figured that hanging out here was a good a place as any seeing as she didn't know where he lived. The only place she knew about him being at was school, so perhaps he could catch her here at this "neutral ground" then maybe that could talk. Hope springs eternal right?

[Emma Anderson]

Like hell she knew what to think. She had been avoiding just about everyone...including her parents...er...grandparents...Hell. She didn't know. A frustrated little sigh passing her lips as she ran her tongue across her lips and reached up to push her hair back behind her ears. Today was another one of those..."Just get out" days. She had woken up and as soon as she opened her door they had started with the questions and the badgering. Sure, she should have been used to it, but to be honest...she wasn't able to handle it right now.

Shaking her head, she would stuff her hands into the pockets of her jacket and start jogging forward. She had come to the park, because it was about the only place she knew of that would not end with her being pestered and bugged about something she had no answer too.

How do you feel?

What do you think?

Are you mad at us?

She growled...not usually one to get angry, she was clearly pushed to her breaking point after all of this. Head down, she kept her eyes on her feet and on the feet that came toward her, to make sure she didn't run into anyone in her little jog through the park...that would just make things worse. Nobody wanted to be run into by a deaf girl who couldn't even hear them yell at her for being a clutz.

The thought alone making her want to retreat...but she didn't. Instead she kept pressing forward until she eventually hit her limit...the cold air, the stress and her current emotional and mental state not making for the best running condition...though it had helped to at least take her mind off of things for awhile.

However as she stopped and looked up, her eyes would fall upon an all too familiar figure...lower lip bitten as she watched him for a moment...not sure if he had yet to see her. She loved her brother...er...dad...er...whatever...But she had been so confused lately that she didn't know what to think...Not to mention that lingering fear and doubt that he had walked away because he didn't want her....that this had all been a lie brought about by not only him...but their..his...parents. Still, she had been avoiding him long enough...she guessed....

Her head down, hands once more stuffed away and fidgeting wildly within her pockets, she would approach...dragging her feet the entire time. Though, when she did near him...all she would do was pull one hand free from her jacket and give a silent, brief wave to signal hello and then force herself to glance upward to look at him...having no other choice but to read his lips...

[The Fearless Sausage Cook]

Frank saw Emma run by, his eyes looking on her, wanting to call out her name or something, but knowing she wouldn't be able to hear him. That and he didn't know if she wanted to see him. Yeah, he picked this spot because it was kind of a neutral ground, but it was her park so he felt kind of bad about being here. A little stalker-ish actually. So he'd let her pass his gaze and pretend not to notice, hoping that she'd notice him and would want to talk and not leave. Knowing what she must think of him now, which killed him, because it wasn't true, but now that he knew, it sure as hell felt like it. Though as she stopped running he'd give her a sheepish little smile. Actually really nervous about this, which was funny, considering what he had done in the marines.

Smile relaxing a bit as she waved at him walking towards him. All the words he had prepared to say to her over the last month fading in this moment. All the apologies, explanations, everything fading away as he drew his fingers together. Signing, "Hi, Emma."

ASL, it was his now hobby. Ever since he found out Emma was deaf. Even before he learned that she was his daughter. In fact after that, he had started learning it more vigorously. Wanting to be able to communicate well with her. It wasn't exactly easy, being as it was a language unlike any other language on the planet, but Frank figured he was doing a good job picking it up. Then again, he had a knack for languages. Nothing phenomenal, he was just good at picking up on conversation and that had a little cross over with ASL.

Waiting for her to respond in some way he'd then follow up with one of the other few signs he knew, "How are you?"

Though he was beginning to relax in her presence he was still quite nervous. Afraid that she wouldn't forgive him for leaving, that she would believe that he knew all along he was the father and that was why he left. But it was time to shove those fears aside right? Which is what he would do as she slid over on the bench, giving her able space to sit down. Waiting for the conversation to start with somewhat bated breath, finding it ironic that he was more comfortable in battle then with this. Afraid of losing his sis-daughter...

[Emma Anderson]

To be honest, she was a bit taken back when he would sign out her name along with his greeting, her brow arching slightly as she would move to instinctively raise her hands and reply before stopping herself. She could tell he wasn't too sure about himself as he "spoke" and so she guessed he was still learning...perhaps a bit too soon to start ranting at him with her fingers. Heh.

Then he would ask how she was and she would look away, eyes glancing down at the ground before she would shrug slightly. How was she? Yet another question that she honestly didn't know the answer to and though she felt that frustration building within her she would keep it contained for the time being. Her hands moving to her shirt and pulling at the collar to pull out that notepad she always wore...jotting down her reply rather slowly..having to give it some thought really.

I am alright. I guess.

Turning it toward him and shrugging a bit to suggest that she wasn't entirely sure if that was the truth or not, but figuring it was the best way of putting it. She wasn't dying...so she was alright. If just barely. A single hand moving to sign toward him, figuring a single word wouldn't be hard to decipher.

"You?"

Her eyes again darting toward him as she would softly nibble upon her lower lip and sway a bit on her feet before eventually taking him up on his offer to sit down...Though she made sure that when she did, she was at the opposite end of the bench, pressed against the arm rest thingy and sort of curled into herself. She wasn't sure what to think of him or anyone that she thought she knew and could trust...not anymore. In fact, she felt completely and utterly alone at this point in her life and there didn't seem to be any sort of relief in sight....nothing was going to magically make it okay and she was old enough to know that and to not try and hold onto some childish delusion..despite how innocent and sweet she was at heart.

Some things, you just can't deny....and this was one of them. A soft sigh given...not sure what to say to him and therefore staying..."silent" as her hands fidgeted in her lap and her head reluctantly turned toward him to see what he was going to say...do...whatever.

[The Fearless Sausage Cook]

Frank would let out a stifled chuckle as she looked down. One that was more at the amusement of the situation, those words. The standard "small talk" that you always had to seem to take part in before dealing with the real stuff. It was really kind of funny when you thought about it. You asked that question how are you and the immediate response was always something brief, something positive, not matter how bad the other person was feeling. It was just a quick, non commital response that you were looking for. Something that didn't really delve into the heart of that matter, Like in this case for example. Watching her right down that reply. Though her answer was probably true, it didn't really dig at the heart of the issue between the two of them and that much was expressed in her shrug.

As she asked that question of him he would attempt to sign out the same thing, "I am alright."

Though that didn't really get at the heart of the issue either, and his eyes said that much. That this was just the ritual that they had to go through to get to the real issues at hand. He looked at her on the other side of the bench, as far as possible away from him. Frank knew he wasn't trusted, why should he be? He had abandoned her, even he felt that now. He had been a stupid kid, but that didn't make it okay. That didn't excuse him from walking out, especially on her, more so now that he knew she was his daughter. Guilt inside for everything, though he knew much of it wasn't his fault.

After a long pause he'd sigh, "I never knew I was your Father Emma. Not until they told me."

It was all he could say at this point. This wasn't a conversation that they could just sign out, well he couldn't at least, she could. His knowledge of the language wasn't enough. So he'd have to talk, and try to explain his side of the story. And see if she'd forgive him from there.

"I'm sorry for leaving Emma, if I had known I would have stayed, I should have stayed anyway. I know it doesn't make it right but I was only a stupid kid." Frank sighed.

After another long pause he'd explain, "They only told me because they want you to have that surgery. They want to me to sign the consent form. That's the only reason I know I'm your father. The girl I slept with just disappeared a few weeks after, and I never knew. I never put two and two together. But they told me because they wanted me to sign the form. Something I don't intend on doing. Not unless you want to."

[Emma Anderson]

She noticed the expression that seemed to indicate he was laughing, at least lightly and her brow would furrow slightly. She wasn't entirely sure what was amusing about any of this...and confusion swept through her mind. Still, she wouldn't say anything, guessing that perhaps this was just his way of handling things...Who was she to judge?

Taking her seat beside him, and yet at a distance she would nod slightly as he said he was alright...and then...before she could even bother to try and come up with some other form of avoidance, he would blurt out those words about not knowing he was her Father until recently. Everything she had given to conceal the whimper which lodged itself within her throat, causing her breath to cease for a moment...her heart beating in that ache...dull throb it had been doing since all this happened.

She wanted to say something, she wanted to tell him how she felt, but for that she would have to actually get a handle on exactly what that was. Not something she had been able to achieve in the last month and not sure she would be able to do it in the few minutes that she sat here....Possible...But she just didn't know. To be honest, she didn't know much of anything anymore...Her days were filled with nothing but confusion and loneliness....School being her only real distraction and even there she had been making a point of avoiding anywhere and everywhere that he might be. Something she felt bad about, but she just...had to be selfish right now.

Glancing up at him, he would continue and those big innocent eyes would watch and nod slightly to say that she understood what he was saying...though it was clear that it didn't really mean that she believed him. She just...understood. Her fingers twisting about in her lap...she would turn away when he was done and look down at her hands....a deep breath as she struggled to try and come up with something....anything...to say. Eventually...her hands would cease and move to grab up the notepad, jotting down what she wanted to say and hoping that it was at least somewhere along the right track.

You left me...

A slight pause...not having meant to write that...but then, as she read it, realizing that deep down...she had. Shaky hands slowly turning the paper toward him as she would swallow past the ever increasing lump in her throat and release a shaky, uneven breath...her chest tightening as eyes burned with tears that refused to fall. Forcing her back to straighten she would try...as hard as she possibly could...not to cry. She just...couldn't. She had cried too much in private...and she had pretty much taught herself to try and internalize the pain...It was just easier.

A few moments given...to collect herself mostly...before she would lift her eyes to meet his own once more. She didn't have anything else to say just yet...because of all the things that she could say..this was the thing that mattered the most to her.

[The Fearless Sausage Cook]

He noticed that emotion when he blurted out that he didn't know he was her father. Not that it was really written on her face, but in her actions. Frank knew that discovery for her hurt, why else would she have run away that night? It had been quite a shock for both of them, though more so for Emma. Any forgiveness she had given him for leaving her as her brother was, in his mind, erased when she found out that he was her father. And for Frank, it probably should be. While the selfish part of him wanted to say that he didn't know and that should make it okay, he wasn't going to even let himself feel that. He would give his defense, but he wouldn't fight it tooth and nail. That was just how it was going to be.

It was at this point he kind of felt bad for seeking her out. For violating her space, because while it had been a month this was something that she needed time for. But the uncertainty of if all, it had been killing him, along with the new revelation of that little fact and not having time to discuss it with her. So he had up and done it. Waited for her here, at her park.

As she nodded, Frank knew what she was feeling. She wasn't sure she wanted to believe him, and why would she? Funny, Frank took this as a good sign, while taking note of the seriousness of this. It was better then her just getting up and leaving, he had to admit. His eyes lowering to his thumbs that were now twiddling against each other nervously. She was looking away from him, and he was trying to believe that she was not trying to plan his downfall in some way. So he sat there having a difficult time sitting still, which was saying something for a man who had lay in wait for days to kill someone, literally not moving. He found that he was incredibly nervous for her response, wanting to get up and pace as he waited.

Though when her hear her jotting down her words for him his attention was rapt, towards that notebook. Fighting the urge to peek over her shoulder he'd wait for her to turn it to him to reveal his doom to him. How she never wanted to see or talk to him again. Noticing how it was taking her a long time to decide to show him, getting worried all the more. When she finally did turn that notebook towards him he would see those tears in her eyes, noticing how hard she was trying to keep from crying. Eyes lowering towards the paper he'd let out a long sigh after reading those words.

A long pause and another sigh would come before Frank would speak slowly, "I did, and not a day has gone by where I haven't regretted it, even though I was trying to send you letters. I wish more then anything that I had stayed."

He would intentionally not put in his reasons for leaving in the first place. For not mentioning again that he didn't know she was his daughter. He didn't want to seem like he was justifying his actions. He just wanted her to know how much regret he had for that decision.

Frank would still be turned to face towards her, though his eyes would lower though in guilt, "I want to ask of your forgiveness of leaving you, though I will understand if you can't."

He would sigh, expected the awaited I don't forgive you message. Ready to get shunned now by the only true family he cared about. The thought of which hurt rather significantly. But he knew that is was what he deserved, her scorn. Though he was finding that he'd rather give up his position as her father and just be her brother again, if it would make things better. If it would keep him and her on good terms. But he knew that that was something that couldn't happen. Not anymore. That thought being irrational, but coming from the fact that after all these years, after finding her again. He just didn't want to lose her again...